Awareness of our values is skill number 3 in growing our Spiritual Intelligence. Do you have an awareness of your values and do your inner values shine on the outside?
When I work with clients who are exploring their Spiritual Intelligence, one of the first activities I challenge them to define and decipher is their values. Once they have a core list – sometimes the list is long – I ask them to choose the top five; then I ask them to rank them in order of importance.
I often get resistance. (What? Let go of 15 of my 20 values? Huh?)
We can often recite a lengthy list of values we claim to hold dear. However, when confronted with an extensive list, we need to discern whether these values are genuinely ingrained within us, or consider if they are merely ideals we feel obligated to uphold. Do we adopt these values because we believe others will admire us for possessing them, or are they truly guiding principles that govern our actions and decisions? It’s crucial to discern whether these values are merely espoused or if they authentically inform our everyday conduct.
(I will share more on the challenge of knowing our values and living our values when I discuss Skill 14 of Spiritual Intelligence. Watch for it on my blog here.)
Working on your values
I offer clients a checklist of values descriptors they can work with and I invite them to add their own. It is a simple tool to start the conversation. If you want to begin thinking about your values consider these questions:
How are you showing up? How do you imagine you are showing up? (Yes. those may be two different questions.) How do others see you? How do you want to be seen? What are the results of your actions? If you reflect on your inner and outer alignment, what is working and what needs an update?
I love working with people confidentially who are curious and want to dig into this. If you are curious reach out for a private conversation here.
So I am keeping it short today, but the challenge I am giving you is huge.
Now, some inspiration from scripture and popular culture:
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23
Lyrics from a favourite song . . .
Teach Your Children
… You, who are on the road
Must have a code you try to live by
And so become yourself
Because the past is just a goodbye
… Teach your children well
Their father’s hell did slowly go by
Feed them on your dreams
The one they pick is the one you’ll know by
Song by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young
You can listen to the 1970’s song here. The animated video is relatively modern and quite compelling.